Positive Vibes In Laker Land

Well Lake Show, you got what you wanted. You got your playoff spot. You got your #7 seed. You got your rematch with the defending champs. And man are you all feeling yourselves right now. Even though the Nuggets are waiting in the wings, rubbing their hands together and licking their chops and salivating and the chance to smack you all around again. 

The Lake Show and Car Flag Nation aren't thinking about that right now though. They're just basking in the glory of that play-in tournament win. If you thought they were excited about winning the Ears In-Season Invitational, you should see them right now.

Let me put it this way, the car flags are out this morning in So Cal. Hit up any freeway right now and look in any direction, it’s purple and gold car flags flapping in the wind as far as the eye can see. And if you listen closely, you can even hear the Randy Newman pumping in every single one of those cars, max volume.

Here’s how you know the vibes are way up in Laker Land… even the Ham is puffing his chest out right now. And even Car Flag Nation is hyped on the Ham this morning. All of a sudden, Laker honk isn’t looking for the nearest wood chipper to run the ham through. Suddenly Darvin Ham isn’t all that is wrong with the Lake Show. 

Car Flag Nation absolutely ate up the Ham’s postgame performance last night. Which started in the locker room, when he dropped this line.

“We want all the smoke and we ain’t ducking no fades.” It’s actually a great line. It’s actually the coolest thing the Ham has ever said. Except for that one little issue… the smoke he’s inviting is the smoke coming off the defending champs. The smoke he’s inviting is the smoke coming off the team that has smoked the Lake Show the last eight straight times they’ve played. And smoked them right out of the West Finals in a four game sweep.

But there's no denying it, the Ham and the Lake Show clearly want that smoke. All that smoke. Clearly the Ham and the Lake Show aren’t ducking the Nuggets, because they just had a chance to duck the Nuggets and instead they did the exact opposite. 

And look, like I said yesterday, they were in an impossible spot. They were stuck between a Ham and a hard place. Obviously tanking a game in a play-in is an extremely risky move. But so is aiming for the defending champs who’ve beaten you eight times in a row and then running your mouths afterwards and inviting quote "all the smoke."

Leave it to the Lake Show to take basically their first opportunity all year to chirp and then blow right past chipping to screaming their smack into a megaphone. Which included insane asylum smack when the Ham was asked about the idea that they might have wanted to avoid a matchup with the Nuggets.

No dude, it's just the people who watched your last eight games against the Nuggets. It’s just those of us who remember the West Finals, and everything that’s happened since, and realize that steering into those dudes seems pretty doomed. Especially when you've actually had success against the Thunder. 

But I get it Ham, believe me I get it, you want all the smoke. And believe me, you're gonna get all the smoke. You're gonna get exactly what you want Ham, don't you worry. And it's not just the Ham that's looking for all the smoke, AD has been inviting the smoke from Denver since the offseason. Remember, When he took issue with the way Denver celebrated their Larry O. 

We can’t wait for what??… To get smacked by them again? Dude, that version of I CAN'T WAIT had even less punch than Dino in Vegas’ version. And I would have bet my life that it wasn't even possible to drop an I CANT WAIT lamer than the Dino in Vegas’ version. 

So forgive me Car Flag Nation if I’m not quite as fired up as you are this morning. Because I’ve heard this team talk a huge game before. But all I’ve seen on the floor are the Nuggets wiping the floor with this team. These dudes talk big but so far, they haven't backed any of it up. Congrats. You won a play in game. You had to actually play your way in to the postseason.  Have you hung your play-in banner yet? Scheduled your parade for beating the Pels in a playin game yet? 

But I know, I know, you want all the smoke. You’re not ducking any fades. And THEY'RE the ones that talk too much. Right... You know why they talk so much: same reason anyone does anything.  Because they can. Oh, and they’re the defending champs. The Question is, why are you talking so much? Not because you can: but because you won the ears invitational?  Because you won a play in game? Because you’ve won nothing.  And the nuggets have smacked you the last eight times you’ve played them.  And if you’re going to hit me with, yo Rome, what is the ham supposed to say?  My answer?  Nothing.  He should say nothing. And he really shouldn’t be saying things like we want the nuggets and if you think otherwise you belong in an insane asylum.  See, ham, the question isn’t are you going to win this series; because you’re not: the question, will you even win a game. But you got what you wanted.  Instead of telling us that’s what you wanted, just show us. Because no one can hear a word you’re saying.  I know LeCap can’t: because he’s not listening. He's been tuning you out completely for months.

And by the way, would you even have won that game if Zion doesn’t go down late in the fourth quarter? Because Zion was COOKIN. And I'm not talking about gumbo. Zion was having a NIGHT. Zion was the best player on the floor. I think Zion looked better last night than he ever has as a pro. And he deserves some bleeping credit this morning, for real.

Because Zion was the one getting cooked when these two played in the Ears In-Season Tournament. And it finally dawned on the dude that he needed to PUT THOSE BEIGNETS DOWN and finally get himself in shape. And did he ever. Now the dude looks great. Look great, feel great, feel great, ball the hell out. And he just balled the hell out against the Lake Show. And it’s heartbreaking and devastating to see him lead his team back the way he did only to get dinged late. 

Even more brutal if he can’t make it back for Friday night against the Kings. But when he was out there last night, he was MONEY. It had to be a tough watch for you haters. It was a tough night for the Zion Weighs-a-ton crowd. He’s not Pie-on Williamson anymore, clowns. So no more Zion Eats-A-Ton for you. Zion National Pork doesn’t work anymore guys. Nor does Air Gumbo. Or the Big Diabetic. Or the Chunk of Dunk.