Cringe-A-Russ Is Back At It

Hey Broncos Country… let’s chat. 

Hey Broncos Country, let’s chat... About THAT dude. AKA you’re QB. Maybe. You’re QB, as of right now. As of right this second, Russell Wilson is still the guy in Denver. Technically. And apparently if it was up to Russ, UNTIL THE END OF HIS CAREER.  Even if it doesn't seem like there's anyone left in Denver that wants that old sack of potatoes around anymore.

Still, Russ made it clear over the weekend on the I AM ATHLETE pod with Brandon Marshall that he's all for staying in Denver if the Broncos still want him. It's just that it definitely doesn't seem like the Broncos still want him. 

I say that just based off the fact that Denver tried to make him waive his injury guarantee and then benched him for the last two games of the season. I'm not looking to get on the guy. It's not like I go out of my way to trash Russet. Even the Russet thing... It's only a thing because Tariq Woolen is hilarious. 

That's just one of the funniest clips ever, of course we're gonna have fun with it. Because it will never stop being funny. In fact, it'll never stop getting funnier and funnier. Just like Russ will never stop being corny and cringy and cheesy. It is what it is. And as long as that’s what it is, people are gonna dunk on the dude.

But I’ll say this for Cringe-A-Russ... He's handled a crappy situation in Denver really well to this point. He's kept a great attitude about that crappy situation. And I'd love to just focus on that part... But my dude makes it really hard every time he finds a camera or a microphone. Because every time he finds a camera or a microphone, he spews nonsense like this

Two Super Bowls in the next five years? What is he gonna go to Kansas City to back up Mahomes? My dude, I would just worry about finding ONE team that actually wants you to be their starting QB before I start worrying about winning TWO Super Bowls in the next five years. 

Bro, how the hell are you gonna win TWO rings if you don’t have ONE job? You want to feel a CHILL... You're way more likely to feel the CHILL of a cold metal bench on your ASS than a Lombardi in your hands.

Especially since you only won one ring when you had a great job. And you were in your prime playing for a stacked team and had a star running back and a whole Legion of Boom behind you. Despite all that, you won one time. And now anyone’s supposed to believe that you’re about to rip two Lombardi’s past the age of 35?

I don’t think anyone is even buying that he’s making it another five seasons, let alone ripping two rings in those five seasons. Dude barely looks like he’s gonna make it another five months in the league, or even five weeks, let alone five more seasons.  

Look, I get it, he’s trying to save face and he’s trying to get a job. So he’s gotta say what he’s gotta say. He just needs to know how ridiculous he looks and sounds to everybody else. Then again, he's never taken the hint before, so why start now? It's way too late for this dude to stop bringing the cringe and the corn and cheese. That's just who he is.

But again, he should also get credit for handling all of this with class. And continuing to insist that he wants to be in Denver, and finish his career in Denver, even though there are reports swirling that he has one foot out the door in Denver and even has his house listed for sale. You know, the one with all the bathrooms.

Yeah, exactly, that last part. People think you’re out of there for a pretty good reason, because it doesn’t seem like the people running the Broncos want you there. Which is why they tried to get you to drop your injury guarantee and why they benched you for two games at the end of the year. 

We’re about to find out for sure HOW Denver feels about Russ. Because to cut him and move on would come with an $85 mil dead money cap hit for next season. It all kind of depends on what Sean Payton wants and how fast he can get his hands on another QB. 

Here's what Sean just told me in Vegas in front of the Bellagio about what he's looking for in his next QB. 

I think I get it now. I think I understand where it went so wrong between coach and QB. Sean Payton and Russ clearly went on a ski trip, and Sean asked the dude, hey Russet, can you pop on my seat heater it's a little drafty in here... And Russ got all flustered and confused and couldn't figure it out. And that was the moment Sean knew... This isn't my guy. This isn't gonna work. I need somebody who can process bleep quickly.  I need a QB that knows how to work his damn seat heaters.

Look we'll see how this all actually plays out. We're all about to find out if Sean can get his hands on another QB who can actually process at the speed he's looking for and can actually operate the amenities of his luxury sled. But the one thing everyone knows for certain, no matter how this plays out, is that the Sack of Potatoes isn't getting anywhere near two Lombardi’s in the next five years. At this point, he'll be lucky to just land one starting job.